One Liners

Do you know the punishment for bigamy? Two mothers-in-law.

First guy (proudly): "My wife's an angel!" Second guy: "You're lucky, mine's still alive."

A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?" And the father replied, "I don't know son, I'm still paying."

The bumper sticker read: "I lost 250 pounds in one day, I divorced her."

What is the difference between a dog and a fox? About 5 drinks

Why do men die before their wives? They want to.